30 September 2010

He's a BAAAAD man!

#4, and the only reason it's not #5 is the fact that Spartacus didn't race in '08! He'll be so heavily marked during the RR that I doubt his pre-race trip to the bathroom will go un-noticed.

Oh, and I was talking to #2 son this morning about the whole Contador affair, and he was dubious, to say the least...

The new, and probable theory...
AC was on Clenbuterol over the Winter/Spring off-season to stay lean and not lose too much muscle. He then pulled blood out to freeze and save to be transfused at a later date.
The night after the stage into Pau, he was transfused with this bag of blood. Knowing he'd be tested on the rest day, AND knowing that the half-life of Clen is 24 hours, worry about testing hot didn't enter his mind.
The next day, the other shoe fell...OOPS!

As for me...I've been cleared by the Doc to race cross, so I ventured near the cave today. It sucked pretty hard, but felt good at the same time. 20 minutes @ cruise/SST and 10 minutes @ 90-ish%. The last 60 seconds really sucked. Time to maybe start training...
Same shit tomorrow...

29 September 2010

(not so) Un-fucking-believable


He's obviously been training in rural China. Hard for an IV asthma drug to get into your chicken salad...just sayin'...
What a complete assbag...but we knew that already, didn't we?

The Man-Child

'All-Twitch' put it on the U23 World last night! Now, turn the boy into a Classics rider and watch him clean up. New nickname? Crassus...the man who slayed Spartacus!

28 September 2010


So, now the hippies in California are against bicycles? When, oh when, will an earthquake just split that place off into the ocean?
And the next one is for all of my tri-dork friends...
Please, please, please, if you stop one person from doing this, you've helped all of us! I'll bet his T1 time was blistering though...

This morning's ride was nice. 2 days of rain, and an overcast sky forced me to dig out a baselayer and gloves. The dirt was in good shape...not a sloppy as I thought it might be. The CX bike was the right choice this morning!
Have a good day peeps!

27 September 2010

Mt. Washington Hill Cimb

Would this ^^^^^^^ be considered a banana hammock?

26 September 2010

2010 Vista GP

Fulspeed put on the Vista GP again this year. Unfortunately for him, after 6 weeks of bone dry weather, it freaking rained! It kept turnout low, both for racers, and spectators.
I needed to get away from my loving family, lest I kill them all, so I wandered down, digital SLR in hand.
I burned off almost 100 pics...only 60 were worthy of sharing. Sometimes, you just let the motordrive fly and see what happens. Not all shots can be winners!

Here's the album....2010 Vista GP

If anyone wants the original files, please let me know. The files are HUGE! 4000x2600 huge!

Now, back to my wheel search...

25 September 2010


Looks like Specialized gets the 'King Douchebag Award' of Interbike 2010...and in Vegas, that's an accomplishment.
It seems they had a big booth at the convention center, yet were scanning badges of attendees. Big deal you say? Well, they were scanning the badges into their database to see who was, and wasn't, a dealer for the Big S. If you were, you got into the booth. If not, you were turned away by security. Security? Really? Cyclists sure must be a violent bunch!
I'm not the sharpest tool in the shed, but I know that, on the first day of business school, you learn that your customer's customer is your customer! In this case, it seems Specialized cares more about stroking their dealers than letting people see their product. Nice...
Yet another reason I won't buy a Specialized product. Between broken frames, broken wheels, and now this, one could postulate that they are turning into Trek.

23 September 2010

Hang in there...

It's almost the weekend. I know I'm hanging by a very thin thread...
Felt really crappy when I threw the leg over the top tube this morning, but as I rolled, my mood improved, and I felt better the longer I was out. Unfortunately, other responsibilties prevented me from staying out all morning. The HoD+ was all I could swing.
We NEED some rain. It's DRY and loose back in the secret spot. Lots o' sliding around in the powdery silt this morning. It's okay, it's good for the handling skills.

Phinney goes to BMC! Not exactly shocked on this end. He can explain it however he wants, but I've discussed it with a few people, and the general consensus is that he wants to distance himself from Radioshack and Lance, just in case. When a bomb goes off, there tends to be collateral damage. Plus, Lance pulled his normal dick behavior when Phinney got the first offer from Och and BMC.

And the rats are jumping off Riis' sinking ship. He signs Contadork and the rest of the team bolts. Catch a hint Barney. Oh, and very classy move crapping on Cancellara. I have a sneaking suspicion that you'll be eating those words next Spring, wherever Spartacus lands.

Oh, and the Gruber Assist is going to be available...great...we'll need an x-ray machine at local races now!

Now to go wash the cross bike...

21 September 2010

Fan? Running...

Shit? Now hitting it...

Italy pops 35 for dope...

Papp's little pill party is netting names, including one who started using EPO when he was a Cat 3!!! Yeah, you read that correctly...
The indictment and plea deal are supposed to be sealed in this GIANT case, but we all know, much like what happened in baseball, the names will eventually leak out. Personally, name the names and let's do this! Papp sold dope to 187 'clients' through his website. 187!!! While that doesn't sound like a big number, I'd be willing to bet that someone who reads this paragraph has toe'd the line against a doper in the past 3 years!

Even Lance's ass may be in the sling soon...

Gonna be an interesting fall and winter...

Did the HoD+ on the cross bike this morning. I've come to the conclusion that I'm allergic to whatever tall grass is out in the fields on my little cross loop. They were cutting this morning and I feel like hell right now. I'm no M.D., but it doesn't take much to correlate the two!

Anyone interested in a carbon ISP frameset? Let me know! I have something working...

19 September 2010

Photo post

Hey, aero dorks, this is the position you should emulate. It will make you faster. Well, maybe, maybe not. Having superior genetics doesn't hurt either. TP won by .14 seconds over the bald midget. The little fella didn't look happy about it either...

Stevil Kinevil got his new pinky/pimp hand ring. Bitches better have his money by Friday! He's taking reservations for forehead punches (he'll be punching you). The lead time is at three months right now. I'm #73!

JFK was a lot smarter than people knew...but not as smart as this guy...

I did a nice ride with a couple of guys yesterday. The three of us knocked down a loop through WC and Lexington County that was hilly, windy and a whole lot of fun. No real efforts were made, but I still finished the 80km in 2.5 hours.
This morning, I finished my little 4 day stretch with a 90 minute ride on the cross bike. 5 rides in 4 days is good for you!

Congrats goes out to Bond for once again claiming the SC State RR 35+ title. 3rd year running as well. FK was 2nd and not-so-big-anymore Jamie was 3rd. JC finished 3rd in the 40+. GW missed the podium by one spot in the 30+. Both junior categories were won by grommets from Sunday's program. Good show fellas!

Gonna go nap now...peace!

17 September 2010

The weekend is upon us!

So I clicked of another ride this morning. That makes 3 rides in a 24 hour period. I wasn't feeling really all that chipper this morning, but I'm glad I stayed out. It was one of those days when you start feeling better the longer you're on the bike. After an hour of feeling poorly, I came down Saxe Gotha, and ripped off a 65kmh sprint. Level ground, no wind, rolled into it @ 45kmh. I'll take it.
After that little effort, I felt strangely better and just turned it over for the last hour. I guess I needed to blow out the carbon...

Big stuff going on the next two weekends.
This weekend we have the Night Owl charity ride, State RR, the USPRO TT and the USPRO RR. Next weekend, racing comes to town with the Vista GP. If you can't race, at least make an appearance and support Scotty's efforts to bring racing to Columbia. I'm still under Doc's orders not to toe the start line, but I'll be there taking pictures, so wear your clean team kit!

Oh, and if you have a helmet camera, use it. It may help you survive out there and prove that cagers are assholes. I use mine regularly, and so does this guy!

16 September 2010

Who is this?

Did Bond get his daughter into bike racing? Oh, and if you're curious, those are 24" Lightweights and the bike is setup with Di2! My question? Why no clipless pedals?

And this is how you know if you're truly a pipe-hitting, Big Dick in the World of cyclocross. FMBs with your name on them. It feels good to be a gangster!

My blue bag hit the porch @ lunchtime. By 1:30, the Salsa was rebuilt with a new r/d, ceramic pulleys, new Sram chain and cable. Shakedown ride tonight. Oh, and for what it's worth, the new 6700 rear derailleur works just fine with 6600 shifters. Don't pay attention to the Shimano schematic. The only things that MUST go together are the D/A front shifter and front derailleur.

Road tomorrow morning...haven't decided on Saturday...guess I should break out the decoder ring to see when the group ride is leaving...or I may just go ride in the dirt...


15 September 2010

You're a good driver, eh?

Ken Block begs to differ!

Did the HoP(tm) yesterday...in 55 minutes. I guess I felt better than I thought. Just kind of rolled along.
I took the day off today, as I needed to go to the NE to pick my new Oakley Transistors. If you need glasses, by they regular or sunnies, the only choice is Oakley.

The parts to rebuild the Salsa are tickling in. The new hoop for the rear wheel just hit the door. Still waiting for the blue bag from Probikekit so I can throw on the rear derailleur and a new chain. As for chains, I have a Mavic, a SRAM and a KMC...decisions...
New ceramic pulleys should hit the door any day now. Shit needs to hurry up, I haven't had my daily dose of Vitamin D for about a week, and I'm getting itchy and hard(er) to get along with, as if that was possible.
The next four days will contain at least four rides. I need to get back on it! I've lazed about for about 10 days and am feeling very slothful.


13 September 2010

An ill wind is blowing...

Looks like the USADA is getting ready to put the smack down on some folks! And guess who's at the root of it? Joe "I'm a doper who got caught and is now a snitch" Papp. I guess we now know how that little weasel-beater kept his narrow ass out of Federal PMITA prison.
Now, I'm against doping, per se, but I can tell you that I just don't care that much if the pro dogs are doing it. Hell, let's make a moratorium on testing for 12 months and let 'em have at each other. Welcome to The Thunderdome!

When I hear that Masters dudes are on the AvGas, well...that sort of pisses me off. I know how hard some of my friends work to be good masters racers, and to think that the guys that they are racing against have flammable piss irks me. Rumors have been flying around the Southeast for months. I have no proof and won't names names, but let's just say that if certain guys pissed hot, my jaw wouldn't hit the floor!

Everyone knows my opinion on Papp, so I won't give the POS another mention. Just remember Joe...snitches get stitches...maybe that truck that brushed you last week was sending a message for you to STFU!

12 September 2010


How freaking great is Cancellara?

And yes, Cav did, in fact, bunnny hop over the line FTW!

No ride today...I feel like crap (sinuses), and the H.O. has informed me that she's going to Tampa for a conference...and leaving this afternoon. Thanks for the heads up! I love single parenting with no warning...
(Edit)- She's already gone. Evidently, her flight leaves @ 12:50. She let me know this @ 8:45...

11 September 2010


I made the effort to get the cross bike running last night. No luck! The XT r/d I had in the drawer was for shit, so it got round filed with the parts that came off the bike. Chain (6 rides on it), Ultegra SL rear mech (12 months old) and Token ceramic pulleys (12 months old) all got dumped. New stuff is on the way from the UK. I guess it's on the IR list until the blue bag hits my porch.
My ride this morning was good. I got out early and did two solo loops of the Fort. A few folks were out riding and the new pavement is sublime. Got waves from everyone except a couple of riders that I've known for 15 years...weak...

I also passed many many runners out doing the 9-11 Memorial run. Good on them. I yelled encouragement at them, and it was reciprocated.

Now...on to this "day". 9-11 hangs heavy, and it should. I won't go into politics here, as there is really no point. I will tell you a quick story instead...

On 9-11-01, I was working as a project manager at a now defunct lumber/home building company. I was sitting at my desk early that morning, going over house plans, and listening to the radio. The normal drivel from the a.m. DJs was interrupted by the news that a jetliner had crashed into the World Trade Center. I immediately ran downstairs and fired up the TV in the conference room. People started to trickle in, and by the time the second plane hit, most of the people who actually 'worked' were in the room. We all sat, watching and listening in stunned silence, to the history that was unfolding before us. Folks cried...got angry...called family...even though we were 800 miles away. I got really pissed, then really worried about my friend Christen who worked in the WTC complex. She was walking into her office when the first plane hit. Christen has a 140 IQ and immediately used it to make the decision to get the hell out of Manhattan. She was on the first ferry across to Brooklyn, but I digress...
As well ALL sat there in horror, one of the VPs (Rusty Ashley is his name, if you're curious), who was/is a complete douchenozzle, came into the room and LITERALLY yelled at us for wasting time watching 'something that wasn't important' on TV. Really? REALLY?
I, not-so-politely, asked if he was serious. A heated exchange followed, which included the Irish hot rushing to my head, which is baaaaad. Some left, most did not. I sat in there until lunch, then went home for the day. My eyes did not leave the TV until the H.O. demanded that I stop watching.
The next day, I got pulled into the BIG office and verbally assaulted for being insubordinate towards management. Again, the exchange was heated. Sure, what we were doing at work was important, but building shitty pre-fab patio homes pales in comparison to the horror that visited New York, DC and rural Pennsylvania that day.
It weighed heavily on my mind and spirit for the next week or so. I walked into the VP meeting on September 21st and handed them all a copy of my resignation. I packed my desk, walked to my truck and never looked back.
A few years later, the housing bubble burst and the company went belly up. Shortly thereafter, I saw Rusty again, on this time he was working at Lowe's, helping someone load lumber. Karma's a bitch, isn't it...
My point? Now matter what you were doing then, or what you are doing now, you MUST remember this day and how it changed you, your family, your friends, this country and the World.
May God bless the 2819 lives lost in the attacks that day, including the 60 police officers and 343 firefighters who gave their lives so that others could wake to feel the sun on their faces on 9-12! Even more deaths can be attributed to the rescue effort at Ground Zero. Getting cancer and lung disease is a hell of a thank you for being a first responder. Heroes all...
Don't ever forget! Teach your kids about it! Yes, it's that important!
Here are some numbers that may lend more gravity. Hard when you see it in black and white, eh?

09 September 2010

The best laid plans of mice and men...

So I go out this morning, once again forsaking the God of Tarmac, and the above is the result. I rode for all of 30 minutes before the entire rear of my drivetrain decided it no longer wanted to be a part of the ride. One little stick, about the diameter of Joe Papp's pecker, flipped up and got tangled in the rear mech. I'm no big brain, but I don't think that Shimano's engineers planned for the Ultegra SL derailleur to remain operational when pulled into such an acute angle. For those playing at home, that's an approximately 180 degree flip, and a 90 degree inward twist.
The mech is trash. The chain is trash. The hanger is bent and the wheel is out of true. Fortunately, the Dirt God offered the spokes some protection from the assault. CX-Rays are strong...and $4 each...
I'm going to dis-mantle the tangle of bits later. I'd planned on going to GV to do the training series race next Wednesday. We'll see...
For now, the plan is too throw a used XT mech on there and run it. New stuff will be on the way before the El Sol dips below the horizon tonight.

Seen on the road. I may have to make some stencils this weekend.

A couple of hipsters were in the shop this morning talking about wheelies, skids and bar spins. The photo fully explains my feelings on the topic.

And PLEASE keep the fine folks in Boulder in your thoughts. The fire is still raging. Terrible, just terrible...

08 September 2010

The answer is NO!

So the H.O. takes #1 to school this morning and gets cornered by one of the other mothers. She said she'd appreciate it if I could bring her kids (5 and 8) home with us after school. She has an appointment and will be at our house "about ...5-10 minutes" after we get back from school. The H.O., of course, volunteers me without so much as a call or text. I am made aware of this arrangement @ 11:00.
Fine whatever, it's ten minutes and the boys are all little buddies anyway...
The other mother calls me @ 12:15 to tell me that her appointment has been moved back until 2:30, and she'll be by to pick up the kids @ 3:15-3:30!!!
WHAT. THE. FUCK???!!! I would NEVER ask someone to do that, and I'm an asshole!
So now, a 10 minute favor has been turned into me acting as her daycare b/c she's too lazy/stupid/ignorant to deal with her schedule.
It won't happen again...EVER! That I can assure you! Fucking self-entitled, hippie, trust fund, California douchebags!
Just because I have nothing to do in the afternoon doesn't mean I have the time, or compunction, to deal with BS like this...

From here on out, unless I'm getting remunerated, the answer is NO!

Dr. JB said I should just turn 'em loose in the neighborhood...don't give me any ideas!

07 September 2010

News you can use...

Wanting to buy a carbon bike next year? You'd better go out and buy it right now! Word on the street from Eurobike 2010 is that raw carbon prices are going up...by about 66%!!! Maybe Toray is raising prices because they are now advertising on CNN...
Guess I should start looking for something...

Going to Geelong for the Worlds? Take your swimmies!

A. Schleck and Stuey got their drink on. Riis wasn't happy! Lighten up Barney...it's not like these guys haven't kicked ass for you all season. Of course, they are leaving your employ in about 8 weeks, so...

That DB Landis filed a whistle-blower lawsuit? Really? Even though everything he has in his pocket is hearsay? He's using the 'False Claims Act'? In that case, I'm filing one on behalf of the American people against Floyd for wasting taxpayer dollars for this utter fucking nonsense. Floyd will end up one of three ways. Living in LeMond's guest house, living under a bridge, or hanging from that very same bridge. What a putz!

As for me...
Doug and I did a great ride out into Calhoun County yesterday. Nearly three hours with some tempo thrown into the middle part. Out with a headwind, home with the tail, as it should be.
This morning I did the HoD(tm) loop with no real plan other than rolling my legs over.
I'm tired and mentally drained. The H.O.'s family decided to grace us with their presence last night. Of course, that meant I had to cook for everyone. I think they only stop by when they want some attention, and a good meal.

I also dug out my copy of 'Riding Giants' last night. It's possibly the best sports documentary ever made. The word EPIC should be used to describe this movie, and rightly so. If you haven't seen it, hit up Netflix and get it coming your way! It's beautifully shot and edited, and is more than a surf movie. Just watch it...

Peace and chicken grease...

04 September 2010


I did a nice, easy, relatively slow tour of the old Thursday loop this morning. That is until I turned onto Airbase. I caught the back of a dumptruck and paced him at north of 65kmh until he slowed to turn into McEntire ANG Base. I settled in, and was just getting sucked along in the draft.
After that, I just rolled in. Nice day out there this morning...other than the fact that my 40 year old body is still trying to purge the Barium that I ingested on Thursday. Yeah, that shit just can't be good for you.

Speaking of motorpacing, my old pal Spence did something today that falls somewhere in the gray area that lies between slightly insane and very cool. Most of us, when the urge to pace hits, go anywhere from 2 minutes to 2 hours. Spence decided to motorpace from Charlotte, where he lives, to Holden Beach, NC. If you're curious, that's 200 miles!!! No, that's not a typo...

View Larger Map

How long did he ride? 7 hours 52 minutes! No, that's not a typo either! That's a bit North of 25mph. Impressed? You should be! He said he was 'smoked'...ya think?

Waiting for the H.O. to get home from Tatertown so we can go eat something...

02 September 2010

I love living downtown...

You're close to everything, even the wannabe gang-banger douchebags that inhabit the lower portion of my neighborhood.

Here's the short play-by-play:

A Rider is heading out for a nice ride on his cross bike.
A low-pants wearing, 17 year old, wannabe Crip of African descent picks up a rock.
A Rider eyeballs the DB as he rolls past.
@ 3 seconds later, the rock goes skipping by The Rider's leg.
The Rider grabs a handful of rear brake, slides around 180 degrees and heads back.
Jackass rock-thrower get immediately apologetic when faced with a 40 year old guy who has him by 6 inches and 50 pounds.
The Rider offers to cave in the rock-thrower's cranium with extreme prejudice.
Rock thrower's buddy chimes in. The same offer is extended to him as well.
The Rider remounts and rides off. Count 1...2...3...4...5...
The two DBs started flapping gums and call The Rider names consistent with their upbringing and educational background.
The Rider swings around again and extends the invitation for the aforementioned DBs to repeat their tribal calls.
Both clam up like the low-pants, wannabe Crips that they are...
The Rider then quotes Jay-Z, further blowing their drug-addled, syphilis affected, walnut-sized brains.
"You know the type, loud as a motorbike, but wouldn't bust a grape in a fruit fight..."
The pair of now mentally-castrated, future guests of the State, stand with even dumber-than-stock looks on their faces.
The Rider turns again and rolls away, not looking back and not hearing a word from behind.

I guess they didn't want to explain getting their asses kicked by a guy in lycra.

Moral of the Story? Baggy pants hide tiny balls!

As for the medical report, I had an upper GI flouroscopy this morning. The 'air crystals' were bad, and are continuing to cause trouble in my GI tract. The barium itself smelled okay, but tasted like ground up school chalk mixed into latex paint, with mint. Results? TBD.
I can tell you with some degree of certainty that I will NOT be on the bike tonight or tomorrow, simply because I'd rather not have ANY of the shit that I ingested this morning make a return visit. Right now, it feels like I drank a cup of Quikrete and it's just about done hardening in my gullet.

Oh, and a query. Why is that when you are actively looking for something on Ebay, you can't find it, but when you're broke, there are 47 of that particular item?