01 December 2006

I have the solution to obesity

Yes folks, you'll be reading it here first, so remember where you saw it...

The solution for obesity in America is to close down all Golden Corral and Cracker Barrel restaurants. As you know, the entire company went to the beach a couple of days ago. In the interest of eating in a location that would be acceptible for Il Bambino, we chose Golden Corral for dinner last night. If you can find something to eat at GC, you aren't really trying. If you can't find too much of that thing, you are not even paying attention. I am at my winter weight of 185-ish right now, and I was by far the thinnest person in GC. I had ONE plate of food from the buffet and some banana pudding. There were a few people that looked like Mr. Creosote...! I mean really, if you must have a chair for each ass-cheek, push the plate away.
Cracker Barrel is no better. Nothing like three pancakes, two eggs and three slices of bacon to dull your senses first thing in the morning. We ate at 9 am...I haven't eaten since and feel like I need a half dozen apples and a whole head of iceberg to cleanse my system

Needless to say, I'll be riding on the front both days this weekend.

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